Thank you for writing this. It’s well thought and executed, and despite the work I’ve already done, a couple of these made me pause, which just goes to show that we can always learn more and do better. I appreciate you.
Resonates — most of these dynamics play out in India all the time, despite us being homogenous in some ways and the opposite in others. Your points are relevant . We slip into these patterns more often than we realize, and like you articulated, it takes a conscious effort to notice and correct.
I think this is a great starting place for anyone who's looking to learn more. It amazes me how many people think bigotry just doesn't exist anymore become they don't see it.
"You are not the Truman Show. You are not that interesting. And not everything revolves around your monolingual insecurity." Honestly, that line is perfection. It drives me up the wall when people act weird just because someone’s speaking another language. I try to reflect on my interactions each day, and when I catch myself saying something that felt ‘well-intentioned’ but off, I call myself out. The point isn’t to be perfect. It’s to learn, stay open, and do better.
This piece is well written and has good intention, but it also sort of contradicts itself. It’s racist to mention race but it’s also racist to not see color. It appears like there is no way for white people to discuss race so nobody talks about it and then nothing changes
Hi. So, quick thing — it’s not racist to mention race. It’s racist to mention someone’s race when it has absolutely nothing to do with the story and only serves to make them “other.” That’s not awareness, that’s casual exoticism. Like, if you’re telling me about a girl in Tesco and her Blackness is the first plot twist but never comes up again… why was that the headline? Meanwhile, pretending you “don’t see colour” isn’t the antidote. it’s just denial with a soft filter. If you don’t see race, you don’t see racism. And if you don’t see racism, you’re not helping, you’re just squinting.
Also, yes, people of all races can experience racism. That includes white people. I’m Welsh, and I’ve had more than a handful of interaction with English people where their attitude was one vowel away from a Victorian colonial report. I’ve also been mistaken for Arab more times than I can count — and heard people say disgusting things because they thought I was “safe” to say them around. So this isn’t a trauma Olympics. Racism isn’t a members-only club. But context matters. Power structures matter. And pretending everything’s equal just because you’ve personally been hurt doesn’t erase the larger systems that shape how and why racism plays out.
Finally (respectfully) you last comment is a derailment. Instead of sitting with the examples I wrote, you pivoted to “what about me?” and framed it like you’d be ignored because you’re white. That’s not curiosity. That’s defence dressed up as a rhetorical trap. This post wasn’t an attack. It was an invitation to notice, listen, and shift something. If that made you uncomfortable, fair. But growth doesn’t happen in comfort zones. It happens when we resist the urge to centre ourselves, and actually hear each other.
You’re right, it’s not a competition. The reason I said that is because most of the time when I comment on a post like this I don’t get a response. One time I tried to volunteer at a black non profit and was turned away because my opinion doesn’t matter because I’m white. I wasn’t offended because I understand the times that we live in. My point is you can’t really have a discussion on race while dodging these sensitive spots like it’s a lazer security system. The fact that you responded at all is amazing and I appreciate it. What I’m observing is that black people do all of these things that you’re describing because they aren’t afraid of sounding racist. Snoop dogg’s white guy voice is pretty good. If I mention someone’s race in a story, it’s because their race is relevant to the story. To say it’s not relevant would be to pretend to be colorblind. You see what I’m saying? I’m just trying my best to understand because the whole thing feels very paradoxical and most people are unwilling to engage with it at all. The NAACP wrote an obituary on the “N word.” I’m still hearing it in 2025
Well said 👏👏 such a good read, and reminder as well!
The phrase 'They don’t flatter anyone; they flatten everyone.' is just *chefs kiss*
Thank you for writing this. It’s well thought and executed, and despite the work I’ve already done, a couple of these made me pause, which just goes to show that we can always learn more and do better. I appreciate you.
I've definitely been at the end of all of these. How about: Do you have a nickname I can use? Because they can't be bothered to pronounce my name.
Resonates — most of these dynamics play out in India all the time, despite us being homogenous in some ways and the opposite in others. Your points are relevant . We slip into these patterns more often than we realize, and like you articulated, it takes a conscious effort to notice and correct.
I think this is a great starting place for anyone who's looking to learn more. It amazes me how many people think bigotry just doesn't exist anymore become they don't see it.
"You are not the Truman Show. You are not that interesting. And not everything revolves around your monolingual insecurity." Honestly, that line is perfection. It drives me up the wall when people act weird just because someone’s speaking another language. I try to reflect on my interactions each day, and when I catch myself saying something that felt ‘well-intentioned’ but off, I call myself out. The point isn’t to be perfect. It’s to learn, stay open, and do better.
This piece is well written and has good intention, but it also sort of contradicts itself. It’s racist to mention race but it’s also racist to not see color. It appears like there is no way for white people to discuss race so nobody talks about it and then nothing changes
I bet this won’t get a response because of the color of my skin, but what if I told you that I’ve experienced racism. How would you respond?
Hi. So, quick thing — it’s not racist to mention race. It’s racist to mention someone’s race when it has absolutely nothing to do with the story and only serves to make them “other.” That’s not awareness, that’s casual exoticism. Like, if you’re telling me about a girl in Tesco and her Blackness is the first plot twist but never comes up again… why was that the headline? Meanwhile, pretending you “don’t see colour” isn’t the antidote. it’s just denial with a soft filter. If you don’t see race, you don’t see racism. And if you don’t see racism, you’re not helping, you’re just squinting.
Also, yes, people of all races can experience racism. That includes white people. I’m Welsh, and I’ve had more than a handful of interaction with English people where their attitude was one vowel away from a Victorian colonial report. I’ve also been mistaken for Arab more times than I can count — and heard people say disgusting things because they thought I was “safe” to say them around. So this isn’t a trauma Olympics. Racism isn’t a members-only club. But context matters. Power structures matter. And pretending everything’s equal just because you’ve personally been hurt doesn’t erase the larger systems that shape how and why racism plays out.
Finally (respectfully) you last comment is a derailment. Instead of sitting with the examples I wrote, you pivoted to “what about me?” and framed it like you’d be ignored because you’re white. That’s not curiosity. That’s defence dressed up as a rhetorical trap. This post wasn’t an attack. It was an invitation to notice, listen, and shift something. If that made you uncomfortable, fair. But growth doesn’t happen in comfort zones. It happens when we resist the urge to centre ourselves, and actually hear each other.
You’re right, it’s not a competition. The reason I said that is because most of the time when I comment on a post like this I don’t get a response. One time I tried to volunteer at a black non profit and was turned away because my opinion doesn’t matter because I’m white. I wasn’t offended because I understand the times that we live in. My point is you can’t really have a discussion on race while dodging these sensitive spots like it’s a lazer security system. The fact that you responded at all is amazing and I appreciate it. What I’m observing is that black people do all of these things that you’re describing because they aren’t afraid of sounding racist. Snoop dogg’s white guy voice is pretty good. If I mention someone’s race in a story, it’s because their race is relevant to the story. To say it’s not relevant would be to pretend to be colorblind. You see what I’m saying? I’m just trying my best to understand because the whole thing feels very paradoxical and most people are unwilling to engage with it at all. The NAACP wrote an obituary on the “N word.” I’m still hearing it in 2025
I asked politely, “do you speak another language” and got a look that could kill.
School of languages is for any curious mind.
I like Vulcan, it gets the practical side quicker of ‘what were you thinking’.
which part did you edit? none of that made any sense