“The woman they keep is not necessarily the one they love the most. She is the one they feel most entitled to. The one who makes their world easier, not richer.“
This is so spot on. I was told I was too much, too sensitive, too intense, too opinionated, so I shrank myself to be with my ex, and all he did was mistreat me.
now? Now I am finding my way back to myself. I’m not shrinking myself into bite size pieces anymore. They can choke.
A male lawyer I was working with spilled the beans when he mentioned there are the women he sowed wild oats with and the woman he married.
An engineer (very Catholic) told me he would not date or marry a “professional” woman because they were “too smart” and would not want to stay home and raise children. He was looking for an intellectually “simple” woman.
I also know a few women who would only date “mature, sugar daddies” because “young bucks” their own age don’t treat them well.
There's definitely a trend of "too much" these days. I see it everywhere. Yet never associated with men. Women never seem to say a man is too much. But women are constantly labelled too much.
I guess I will have to find ways to content myself while being single, because I'm definitely done with making myself less.
And I truly hope this story is 100% true and you really did call them on their BS, because we need to do it more!
YES this is so so well written and gets at something so true! I can relate to this so much in my own life, honestly I tried really hard to be the cool happy doormat girl who would never be too much for my ex to handle. Unfortunately (or actually maybe fortunately looking back) I had some physical/health type issues that made our relationship I guess not the absolute easiest it could have been. Not even anything extremely severe, but yes, he would have had to step up a little and give more than the absolute bare minimum in order to make things work. Which he wasn't willing to do. Even though there was so much passion between us, the fact that I wasn't just "easy" for him made the whole thing just too much, and he gave up on me.
He's expressed "some" level of regret about this to me in the years since, but without ever really taking any responsibility. It doesn't bother me now, I'm so so so much happier in my life than I was with him, I can't imagine going back. But you perfectly nailed the behaviour of these types of guys, the way they idealize you and praise you and act like you're so special and different but the minute things get hard, you find out how much they truly care.
You're a great writer, you've got me fired up on behalf of my younger self! LOL
True. This really resonated with events in my life. But also, really can’t be bothered to write about these people/understand their thinking. So kudos to you for laying it out 🤣
“The woman they keep is not necessarily the one they love the most. She is the one they feel most entitled to. The one who makes their world easier, not richer.“
This is so spot on. I was told I was too much, too sensitive, too intense, too opinionated, so I shrank myself to be with my ex, and all he did was mistreat me.
now? Now I am finding my way back to myself. I’m not shrinking myself into bite size pieces anymore. They can choke.
🥳🥳🥳🥳
A male lawyer I was working with spilled the beans when he mentioned there are the women he sowed wild oats with and the woman he married.
An engineer (very Catholic) told me he would not date or marry a “professional” woman because they were “too smart” and would not want to stay home and raise children. He was looking for an intellectually “simple” woman.
I also know a few women who would only date “mature, sugar daddies” because “young bucks” their own age don’t treat them well.
Being yourself can be a tough gig.
Another banger article that wholeheartedly resonates ❤️🔥
There's definitely a trend of "too much" these days. I see it everywhere. Yet never associated with men. Women never seem to say a man is too much. But women are constantly labelled too much.
I guess I will have to find ways to content myself while being single, because I'm definitely done with making myself less.
And I truly hope this story is 100% true and you really did call them on their BS, because we need to do it more!
Well she may not have wanted to marry or date his lame ass anyways. She may have been smarter than you are giving her credit for and playing his ass.
Just want to share this song with you and readers
https://youtu.be/6EqFVWzOfN8?si=MVvWvZcwHuIT9mkO
YES this is so so well written and gets at something so true! I can relate to this so much in my own life, honestly I tried really hard to be the cool happy doormat girl who would never be too much for my ex to handle. Unfortunately (or actually maybe fortunately looking back) I had some physical/health type issues that made our relationship I guess not the absolute easiest it could have been. Not even anything extremely severe, but yes, he would have had to step up a little and give more than the absolute bare minimum in order to make things work. Which he wasn't willing to do. Even though there was so much passion between us, the fact that I wasn't just "easy" for him made the whole thing just too much, and he gave up on me.
He's expressed "some" level of regret about this to me in the years since, but without ever really taking any responsibility. It doesn't bother me now, I'm so so so much happier in my life than I was with him, I can't imagine going back. But you perfectly nailed the behaviour of these types of guys, the way they idealize you and praise you and act like you're so special and different but the minute things get hard, you find out how much they truly care.
You're a great writer, you've got me fired up on behalf of my younger self! LOL
True. This really resonated with events in my life. But also, really can’t be bothered to write about these people/understand their thinking. So kudos to you for laying it out 🤣
Brilliant writing. I always say I’m the ex before the wife. I relate to this so much.
this! this is SO true!